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Alwy
Best viewed with 1024x768 screen resolution | Layout by ©
Alwy
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Monday, May 07, 2007 HeartBrokenx It is the SADDEST day ever out of my 18 yr in my life. Do u noe why?? I really cant stand the way i am feeling right now. I cant say it to anyone cos they will worried. So i decided to write it down in my blog. First time i ever confessed my feelings to a guy tt i deeply in love with. All i tot tt we have feelings together and there are many coincidence that led my feelings for him fell even deeper. As at times when we have our own personal outing with all the camp frenz.., for sure have the both of us.. Even at times,he make me feel that he came down for the sake of me as i am the one who asked him to go or even persuaded him to go.. N i managed to did it w/o failed. though at that moment of time,i still cant confirmed anything but when i told all these things to those fren of mine,they kinda suspect too but at the same time that doesnt mean anything. :( But still,i still follow what my heart told me so n continue to love him. I tried to stay by his side as much or as long as i can whenever i c him cos i'm really afraid of losing him. I dun wanna lose a fren like him too. I like him for almost 6-8 months n i kept my feelings for him till now. I felt it unbearable and that was why i decided to confess to him on his bday. Maybe u were thinking why must be that day yeah?? I oso didnt mean to do if he happens to feel lost or shocked to noe abt this after reading my letter. But to prepare a present for him,i bought for him a PC Wallet from "The Wallet Shop". It is not a matter of how much does it costs me but the value that he have in my heart but somehow i tink he dun get it. He msg me after he read the letter. Though i get rejected,somehow what he wrote is very very saddening. To those fren of mine whom i showed the message to em,they kinda feel huh?? I dunoe how should i say it right over here.. but somehow i dun feel the appreciation by him.. Kinda sad huh?? But all i can say i expected this kind of outcome not denying that i dun hv the confidence when i choose to confess to him. Whatever it is,it is a experience for me as in my 1st time doing sth that needs alot of courage for a girl to do this. It is really not easy if u can really put urself in our girls' shoes. But still, hope he like e wallet n will see him use it no matter what.. :) I noe when i told some of my dearest abt it. They were rather worried for me. Trying to talk things out with me n console me. Thanks for being there for me when i needed u guys the most. Thx for being so sweet and caring as always. I really feel so loved n warmth.. Thanks once again. But seriously though maybe sometimes u guys c me smile here n there, or even hear my laughter very loud,i seriously feel heartbroken deep deep inside my heart. But somehow,i didnt cry ever since den though i feel sad. I seriously dunoe why this time round,my tears didnt rolled down. Sth suprising n sth weird. But somehow sorry if i happened to be kinda quieten down as in looked troubled,dazing or thinking abt something. Some how,i guess nid to be alone ba. Can be happy n high out of the sudden but at e same time,sit at one corner n keep quiet n hear u guys tok n joke around. :) Thats all i wanna say.. But dun wry,i will be fine. I believe i can walk these things out of my life..!! :::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::
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