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Alwy
Best viewed with 1024x768 screen resolution | Layout by ©
Alwy
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Saturday, December 17, 2005 Hey guys.. i finally change my blogskin. Hope u guys like it alright? cos in fact i like it too ;) hee~ Well,i guess i nid time to update from 8dec onwards man.. But it gonna be wkin on it during my off day.. hee~ It gonna be very very long man.. N contain pic too.. haha~ as usual. Anyway i am currently WORKING again. But tis time round is as a WAITRESS. I am wkin at chiang mai palace at china sq central. hee~ Tis is my 1st time wkin as a waitress unlike SALES job. Wanna try sth new.. tts all.. haha~ But when i started wkin,I nv expect to be so tiring.. my god. But fun lah..haha~ End up,i am sick. SERIOUSLY SICK.. cough,sore throat n flu. Cnt tahan when i take order n serve food for the customer sia. Very busy. Lucky no one called but sms.. phew.. But i guess fewer pl is contacting mi too. Guess no one miss mi? I dunoe.. Well,i guess i gonna be disappointed n heartbroken again by someone sia. It seems no matter how much effort n time i hv put in,the person doesnt touched by wat i did at all. Dun even consider mi more than friends. So sad sia. Do many things n many pl even noe who am i by now. Besides,i oso contributed many things too. N yet many pl wonder how come the person didnt treat mi the same like he/she treats the rest. Doesnt it obvious. I guess i reali get the meaning by now. I guess i should reali wake up. The person is jus entertaining mi in surface by not into it. Ya.. should be. No point so sad.. no point crying over it. Guess i am reali wasting my time gg so many times n yet my effort doesnt pay off at all. :'( Sick..no one cares.. So wat if i care the person so much if i reali can see tt the person is tired,sick or feeling uncomfortable? Rite? I guess someone who r very close wit tt person noe the real ans. They dun wan mi to noe cos they dun wan mi to get hurt n disappointed. Aftall they can see i am the ones who reali make the effort to be there n be there wit the person. So my presence n absent doesnt make any difference yeah? Now i reali noe.. Wat i tot in aug is all a pack of lies.. Say what so long nv see mi etc lah.. All lies.. The person is reali a liar. The person nv even noticed mi all the while. I was wearing contact lens all e while n all my frens do noe tt n yet when i get to see the person recently,the person was so so shocked tt i changed alot. Guess i am jus worthless to the person lah. Reali worthless. I told many pl tt the person dun like mi n yet they said i tink too much. I oso told many pl tt i and tt person not close n yet pl said very close.. I reali wat can i say nx. If i am reali close wit the person,I guess i will be treated the same like what the person treated the rest lor. Right? Am i talking sense? Logic? Agreed wit mi? I dunoe.. I'm jus confused. Yes.. wat happen on tt day is jus a drama. All acted it out jus to gif mi a gd memories for tt so-called special day. am i very silly? Or i am reali a fool? I'm a gullible girl yeah? Yah..maybe.. jus so stupid! Some of them r jus hiding sth from mi n kept saying to mi tt the person like mi.. rmb mi.. I doubt so.. Everyone is lieing to mi.. I reali hate pl who lies to mi eventhough they hv no choice to lie to mi abit.. I guess.. I guess.. Haiz.. Guess no one gonna help mi when i'm troubled or sad. Besides,i wanna go into entertainment n music industry. Tis has been my dream since i was young. I nv gif up on my dream since i was young. Can u imagine tt? I started to sing since i was in kindergarten. So i guess i hv been singing more than 10 yrs n i even joined choir as my cca since i was in pri sch. Wat i wanna gain is the experience on performing on stage n the vocal skills. Guess i still nid more practice n improvment. Therefore now i am wkin so hard to earn enough money for myself to sign up for a music sch. So tt i can learnt even more. I guess no one even support my dream,support my decision. EVERYONE including my family tot tt i am day dreaming. Sry lor.. I'M NOT! If pl can go ahead to pursue their dreams,why cant i? Jus cos i dun hv the outer qualities or wat.. the main purpose for mi to sing is to sing to all my loved ones n even able to perform on stage for EVERYONE n get em to recognise my talents,my singing. Is tt so difficult? So wat if i reali get succeed one day,will they be there to support mi? say wat dun gif up dreams n keep on wkin on it. So wat if i didnt gif up my dreams n keep on wkin on it. Must see the judges if they tink i am up to it mah lor. If i cnt even pass their stage,i guess i cnt even make it to the rest of the competition too. Rite? Dreams n money is the most important to mi now. I guess i heck care eventhough i'm sick or watever. When i tell my idols tt i wanna take part in the compeition,they seems no reaction at all.. Ok lor.. fine.. I'll do it myself since i dunoe if they tink tt i am day dreaming or watever lah. Although the path is not gonna be smooth n easy,i am ready for it n prepared anytime on it. As lg i managed to get it,i am ready n prepared to wk as hard as i can. Hope by den,all my effort do pay off by ALOT n not NONE.. :D tts all.. take care guys.. *peace* :::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::
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